The Girl With Scars
by FireDragonRebel
Summary: Ahsoka decides to take on a Padawan of her own. But when tragedy strikes, and the Padawan is left in the Ghost crew's care, they discover she has a dangerous secret, one that could tear herself apart.
1. Chapter 1

(Hi everyone! This is my first fanfic, so please be nice. I always imagine Kanan as a fatherly figure, so that rubs off on my fanfics. Hopefully he still sounds like the Kanan from Rebels on TV. Anyways...enjoy!)

 **Kanan stood in the main room of the Liberator with Hera and Commander Sato. They were supposed to be going over the plans for the raid of an Imperial base on Kashyyyk, but Kanan seemed to be in his own world.**

 **"Earth to Kanan, do you read?" Said Hera** **her hand in front of Kanan's face. Kanan snapped out of his daze and looked at Hera a bit confused.**

 **"What do you think of the plan, love?" Asked Hera innocently, she knew he hadn't been paying attention, but she wasn't going to let this opportunity to tease the Jedi pass her by.**

 _ **Karabast, what was the plan?**_ **Thought Kanan** **, racking his brain for the information that had gone in one ear and out the other. Finally, he decided to play the dumb card, "I'm not sure, how about you tell it to me again?**

 **Hera let out a mental sigh, "How about I tell you it again when we get back to the commons room?"**

 **Kanan felt relieved. "Sounds good."**

 **They started to walk out of the Liberator's main room and into the hallway, when Hera pulled Kanan aside. "What was that? You were supposed to be listening and putting your input into the plan."**

 **Kanan looked away from her and mumbled, "I was...busy thinking about what to do for Ezra's training tomorrow." Hera could tell he wasn't telling the truth, and her motherly alarms started to go off. "I doubt that. Talk to me, love." she said gently, placing her hand on the side of Kanan's face, and pulling it so that he was looking at her.**

 **He looked into her eyes for a few seconds before replying. "Ugh, fine" he said defeatedly. Hera was the one person who could coax this sort of information out of him."Ahsoka said she had to talk to me and show me something at oh-seven-hundred tomorrow morning. She also said not to tell or bring anyone besides Ezra." He whispered, glaring at Hera.**

 **"Hmmmm...Any idea what she wants to talk about?" Asked Hera curiously.**

 **Kanan shook his head, "No idea."**

 **"I'm sure it's no big deal. But we need to focus on the upcoming mission, dear. Okay?" Hera said, planting a quick kiss on his cheek.**

 **"Okay." He replied, returning the gesture.**

(So what did you think of the first chapter? Sorry it was so short, hopefully the next chapter will be longer.)


	2. Chapter 2

**I hope this chapter is better than my previous one. Don't forget to follow and review. :)**

Kanan walked towards the main room of the Liberator, Ezra on his heels. _Why am I so nervous about this? It's just a normal meeting._ He tried to reassure himself, and wiped his sweaty palms on his pants. Kanan couldn't deny that he could feel through the Force that something big was going to happen though.

"So hey, where exactly are we going?" Asked Ezra groggily, Kanan had had to wake his Padawan up from his sleep.

"Ahsoka told me she wanted to meet us this morning."

"Why so early?" Groaned Ezra rubbing his eyes.

Kanan shrugged. "We'll find out soon enough." He turned a corner and walked into the Liberator's main room.

Ahsoka looked up from a datapad when she heard their footsteps. She inclined her head at them, "Hello Kanan. Ezra."

"Ahsoka." Kanan replied politely.

"I'm sure you're both wondering why I asked you to come here today. Well, I've decided to follow your example, Kanan, and take on a Padawan of my own. Isval, you can come out now."

A tall humanoid girl, with long blonde hair and green eyes stepped out of the shadows. She wore plain clothes, and a blaster was holstered at her waist.

"Isval, this is Kanan, and his Padawan Ezra." Ahsoka said, pointing to first Kanan, then Ezra.

Isval was trying to stay calm, but nervous thoughts ran through her brain. Being around three mythical Jedi freaked her out more than she cared to admit. _Isval, ju_ _st stay calm, keep your cool._ She mentally recited to herself. Finally she managed to squeak out the word "Hello."

"Kanan and I need to discuss something for a few minutes, so how about you and Ezra get to know each other?" Asked Ahsoka, even though she said it like a question, it was spoken more like a command.

Isval nodded and quietly walked over to Ezra.

"So...um...where are you from?" Asked Ezra, trying to initiate a conversation with the silent girl.

"Shili." Came Isval's simple yet tense reply.

"Um...nice?" I've never been there, I think Ahsoka's from there though. Is that how you two met? I'm from Lothal." Came Ezra's quick mumble jumble reply. He wasn't quite sure what to say to the girl.

"Yes, that is how Ahsoka and I met. I haven't been to Lothal."

Isval was answering all of Ezra's questions shortly and matter-oh-factly. Ezra felt like he was running out of conversation material when Kanan walked in with Ahsoka. Ezra mentally sighed in relief. _Kanan will know what to say._

 _"_ Ezra and Isval, Ahsoka and I have decided to pair you two up for this mission. You each have a unique set of skills, and together you two should be able to infiltrate the Imperial base and get a set of the schematics for their new ground assault weapon. You guys understand?" Asked Kanan calmly.

The two Padawans nodded in agreement.

Ahsoka smiled, "Good, I shall expect to see you here bright and early tomorrow morning."

Kanan relaxed and chuckled, "Only if I can get this bed-head out of his bunk." He cockily smiled at Ezra and ruffed his raven colored hair.

"Hey!" Ezra protested and wiggled out from his master's friendly gesture. A goofy smile played on his lips though, and he couldn't help silently laughing to himself. He couldn't argue with Kanan, he, Ezra Bridger, was not a morning person.

Ahsoka smiled, "I shall _hope_ to see you two bright and early then?"

"We'll try." Replied Kanan grinning. He walked out into the hallway, Ezra on his heels.


	3. Chapter 3

**(Hello everyone! Hopefully this chapter doesn't seem to slow, I promise the next chapter will have more action/suspense/peril. Anyways...enjoy! Oh, and please review, I read every single review I get.)**

Kanan woke up and yawned. He was used to getting up early and quickly, from his years as a Padawan in the temple. He got out of his bunk, grabbed some fresh clothing, and headed towards the showers.

After he showered and dressed, he pulled his brown hair into its signature ponytail, before exiting the shower rooms and heading toward Ezra's room instead. Kanan opened Ezra's and Zeb's door and leaned against its frame. His Padawan was still asleep, covers pulled mostly over his head to lessen the sound of Zeb's snoring. He walked into the room quietly and gently shook Ezra.

"Time to get up and shower." He whispered.

Ezra groaned and rolled over, "Five more minutes..." He sleepily groaned.

"Sorry Ez. Time to get up and get ready." Kanan whispered. He used the Force to gently probe Ezra to get up.

"Fine..." Ezra mumbled. He pushed his covers back and sleepily climbed down from his bunk. He grabbed a pile of clothing and started to exit the room when Kanan grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. "Meet me in the commons room of the Ghost when you're done"

"Okay, Kanan." Came the teen's groggy reply.

~~~~~~~~~Time Lapse~~~~~~~~~~

Ezra walked into the Ghost's commons room, raven hair still damp and stuck to his head. "Hey Kanan."

Kanan looked over at Ezra, "Want some breakfast?"

"Have I ever refused food before?" Asked Ezra sarcastically.

Kanan grinned, "Good point, there's some space waffles over on the table." He himself had already eaten a light breakfast, but sipped from his trusty cup of Caf.

Hera walked in, a cup of Caf in her hand. She looked at Kanan, "Mornin' love."

"Morning Hera." He walked up next to her. "Are Sabine and Zeb up?"

"I'm don't know, but since they're not going along on this mission, my guess would be that they're catching up on some sleep." She smiled, "Or Zeb is at least anyways."

Kanan grinned. He glanced over at Ezra, the teen was already halfway through a stack of space waffles.

"You almost finished?"

Ezra looked up, a bit of syrup dripping off his lip, "mmmhhhm."

"Good." Kanan drank the last of his Caf, and headed over to the counter to refill his cup.

Hera grabbed Kanan's arm. "Kanan, be safe."

Kanan decided to be cocky, "When have I ever not been safe?"

Hera rolled her eyes, "How about on Gorse?"

Kanan shrugged his shoulders, "Maybe I was a little reckless."

Hera gave Kanan "the look".

"Or maybe I was more than a little reckless."

Hera nodded.

"Don't worry. I'll try to bring us both back in one piece."

Hera planted a kiss on his cheek, "Good."

Kanan looked back over at Ezra. The teen stood up, "C'mon Ez, lets go."

They walked thorough the halls quietly, until Ezra decided to ask Kanan the question that had been on his mind since he woke up. "Kanan?"

"Yes."

"Why is Ahsoka's Padawan soooo quiet? I could barely get her to speak yesterday."

"I'm not sure. Maybe she's just shy. Try getting to know her."

"But how do I get to know her if she won't even talk to me?" Ezra complained.

"Watch her closely, maybe she has a hobby or talent you can ask her about."

Ezra sighed, "I guess I'll try."

Kanan nodded, "Good."

They stepped into the Phantom and sat down. Within five minutes Ahsoka and Isval arrived.

"Good morning you two." Ahsoka said. Isval sat next to her quietly, fiddling with the sleeve of her jacket

"G'morning." Kanan and Ezra replied in sync.

"Is everyone good to go?" Asked Ahsoka.

Isval, Kanan, and Ezra nodded. Kanan sat down in the control seat of the Phantom, punching in the coordinates of the base. He carefully backed it out of its docking space on the Ghost and checked to make sure the hyperdrive was online, before making the jump into hyperspace.

Soon they arrived at the base, and Kanan landed the Phantom in a thicket of brush a quarter mile away from the main building. "Ezra and Isval, you two take the vents. Hera told me that the Imperials have a couple crates of blasters here, so Ahsoka and I will grab a few of them." Kanan handed Ahsoka a set stormtrooper armor, and a stormtrooper helmet, before putting a set on himself.

Ahsoka put her set of armor on, and carefully tucked her lekku into the helmet.

"Everyone meet back here when you're done." Ahsoka said, her voice muffled by the stormtrooper helmet.

They all nodded and split up, each group heading toward their assigned target.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi everyone! Sorry this chapter is short and simple, I had to go shopping with my mom yesterday, which was boring and tiring. (But I got a Star Wars: The Force Awakens poster. *squeals*) So when I got home I didn't feel like writing. Then today my sister had her big Easter musical that I went and saw, but I'm so tired now I don't feel like writing a long, intense, chapter. Lol. Anyways...thanks for having patience with me and this story. Also: a big huge thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited/reviewed this story, you guys are amazing!

 **Isval banged her head on the top of the vent and cringed.**

 **"Shhhhhh." Ezra whispered.**

 **"I'm trying." Replied Isval, a bit exasperated. Army crawling around tiny vents with Ezra's feet in her face was not making her anymore approachable.**

 **"We're coming up on the main office." Whispered Ezra.**

 **Isval just nodded, the sooner she could get out of these vents and get some fresh air the better. Plus, the smell of Ezra's feet was making her nauseous.**

 **Ezra quietly opened the vent covering above the office, "Not a buckethead or officer in sight." He quietly jumped down into the room. "C'mon Isval."**

 **Isval positioned herself next to the vent opening, and taking a deep breathe, jumped down. Her landing wasn't as smooth or quiet as Ezra's, but at least the Imperials had enough sense to install sound proof walls in all their offices.**

 **Ezra pulled a piece of Sabine's Imperial hacking tech out of his pocket and placed it on the Imperial datapad. "If Sabine was right, then we should have those schematics in** **a moment. Ah, here they come." A smirk appeared on Ezra's face, he loved showing up the Empire, and stealing these schematics was one way to do that.**

 **Ezra slipped an empty hard drive into the datapad and copied the schematics onto it, before popping it back out again. "Let's go." Said Ezra, slipping the hard drive in his pocket. He started to walk back towards the vent when an overwhelming chill went down his spine and he dead stopped, eyes wide.**

 **"What is it?" Whispered Isval, but then a chill went down her spine as well and she shivered.**

 **"Kanan and Ahsoka are in danger, I feel it." Said Ezra, a chill in his voice. He ran over to the vent and Force jumped up to it, grabbing the cold slippery metal in his hand. Dangling, he carefully pulled himself into it.**

 **Isval tried to do the same, and after two failed attempts she managed to pull herself into the vent behind Ezra.**

 **Ezra closed his eyes and used the Force to feel where his master was. The Force pulled him toward the docking bays of the base. Suddenly it put a number in his head, "27". Ezra looked back at Isval, "They're in docking bay 27."**

 **"How do you know?" Asked Isval, not sounding convinced.**

 **"Because the Force called me to it. Now, do you know where docking bay 27 is?" Asked Ezra, impatientness showing in his voice. Their masters were in danger, and they needed to find and warn them as quickly as possible.**

 **"Yes, Ahsoka had me study the base schematics before we came." Said Isval quietly.**

 **Ezra was getting extremely impatient now, "Then tell me how to get there!"**

 **Ezra's impromptu yelling startled Isval and she banged her head on the top of the vent again. She mumbled, "Owwww." And rubbed her head. "Take two lefts, then a right, then another left, and we should end up near a service entrance. We should be able to get to them on foot after that."**

 **Without even even acknowledging her answer Ezra started to Army crawl in the direction she had just said.**

 **Isval took a deep breath before Army crawling after him.**

 **Ezra and Isval emerged near the service entrance.**

 **"Where now?" Whispered Ezra impatiently.**

 **"Take two rights, then it should be the third to last entrance on this floor." Whispered Isval.**

 **Ezra peeked out to make sure there were no bucketheads around before sprinting to the end of the hall and taking a right.**

 **Isval ran after him, right on his heels.**

 **They managed to get to the docking bay without running into any Imperials. Ezra threw open the door to the docking bay and ran in, Isval on his heels.**

 **Kanan and Ahsoka looked at them, a confused look on their faces. Kanan opened his mouth to say something, but then he stopped, as an eerie yet unmistakable noise filled the docking bay. There was only one being in the galaxy who sounded like that:**

 **Darth Vader**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi everyone! Warning: sad chapter ahead, read at your own risk. Anyways...I hope you enjoy and constructive criticism encouraged. :)**

"Oh my god." Said Ezra, jaw hanging open. He grabbed Isval's hand and dashed over to Kanan.

"The Sith Lord." Muttered Kanan.

"How are we going to get out of here alive. He almost killed us last time we ran into him." Whispered Ezra, tension in his voice.

"I don't know." Kanan turned toward Ahsoka to ask her the same question, but Ahsoka just stared at the Sith Lord, her facial features tense.

"Master." She shakily said, trying to keep her voice from cracking.

"The apprentice lives." Said the Sith Lord.

Kanan and Ezra just gave each other confused and surprised looks. They couldn't believe that this horrible Sith Lord had been Ahsoka's master.

"Anakin, this isn't who you really are! You're a Jedi knight of the Republic!" Screamed Ahsoka, tears streaming down her face.

"Anakin Skywalker is dead. He was weak and foolish so I cut him down." Said the ominous black figure. He drew his red lightsaber.

Ahsoka drew her white lightsabers as well, and in a surprising move handed one of them to Isval.

Isval stood there stunned before taking the lightsaber from Ahsoka.

Ahsoka walked calmly over to her former Master.

"No Ahsoka!" Yelled Isval. She knew she couldn't help her Master, she had only a few days worth of lightsaber training. But then it hit her, she had been the best shot she knew back on Shili. She grabbed her blaster and took aim at the Sith Lord, she soon had it aimed dead center on his chest. She fired, but the Sith Lord easily deflected the blaster bolt back at her. She narrowly avoided being hit with it. _Okay, bad move._ She thought.

By now Ezra and Kanan were running over to help Ahsoka.

"Specters 1 and 6, get out of here!" Yelled Ahsoka, trying to fight off Vader.

"No, we're not leaving you!" Kanan yelled.

Ahsoka cast a quick glance at Kanan, and in that moment he knew, win or lose, that Ahsoka wanted to do this on her own. He could hear her yelling at the Sith Lord, begging him to change. He had never seen her this desperate before.

"C'mon Spector 6!" Yelled Kanan.

Ezra gave his Master a confused look, but for once, obeyed him. They ran back toward Isval.

"Go Isval" Screamed Ahsoka.

Isval stared at her Master. The world seemed to move in slow motion as Darth Vader swung and the red blade connected with Ahsoka's body, cutting her down.

Isval's whole world seemed to collapse around her. She fell to her knees and screamed at the top of her lungs, "Ahsoka!"

Kanan felt a weigh drop in his chest. Ahsoka, his friend, the one the he had come to when he had questions about Ezra's training or the Force, was gone.

He looked at Isval, despair lined her face. He pulled her up, "We have to run!"

Isval obeyed, and stumbled after Kanan.

They ran out of the docking bay, shooting bucketheads as they ran. Soon they emerged out of the base, and ran through the brush towards the Phantom.

They quickly loaded into the Phantom and Kanan took off. Kanan punched in the coordinates of the fleet, and soon they were in hyperspace.

Kanan and Ezra looked at Isval, she stared blankly at the wall of the Phantom, still in shock.

Isval had known Ahsoka for a few months. When Isval lived on Shili she hunted for a living. Every evening she'd skin whatever animal(s) she'd caught and then bring them to the market to sell. Some days she'd sell everything and wouldn't have anything to eat, other days she'd sell nothing. She dried and cured the pelts to sell as well. Ahsoka had run into her one day and felt that she had Force powers. After about a month or two of buying from Isval, Ahsoka had asked her to become her Padawan. Initially, Isval had rufused, but she eventually accepted. She was quite curious about these "Jedi", and anyways, Ahsoka was the only person who had seemed to care about her in years. Now she was gone, and Isval couldn't believe it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello everyone! I'm so sorry it's taken me so terribly long to update this, I've had writers block, and I've also been very busy. Anyways...thanks for having patience with me! Oh, and I almost forgot, since you guys waited so long for me to update this have two fun facts about the story for you guys:**

 **1\. Isval's appearance is based on my own! I am pretty tall for a girl (5"9'), have long blonde hair, and greenish eyes. :)**

 **2\. Isval's name comes from a book called ,"Star Wars: Lords of the Sith" by Paul S. Kemp. The Isval in the book is a blue skinned Twi'lek though, and my Isval is a human being. (My Isval is completely my own character, minus the name. :)**

Isval blamed herself for Ahsoka's death. Thoughts ran through her brain of ways she could've possibly saved her. She climbed into her Master's bunk on the Liberator, and laid there, thinking. Her Master's sweet and feminine scent still remained on the covers. Isval unclipped Ahsoka's white lightsaber from her belt, and gently ran her fingers down it, before setting it down on the nightstand. She closed her eyes, breathing in her Master's scent.

************Time Lapse****************

Ezra opened the cabin's door and walked in, "Hey."

Isval didn't respond.

Ezra sat on the bed next to her, he wasn't quite sure what to say.

Finally Isval looked at him and sat up, "What are you doing in here?" She whispered.

"I came to check on you."

"I'm fine." She whispered quietly.

"No, you're not. You've been in here three days." Ezra looked into her green eyes.

Isval looked away.

"C'mon, let's go get you something to eat." He gently grabbed her arm.

Isval tensed up at his touch. She brushed off his hand, but stood up. _I wish he would just leave. I don't want to have to talk to anyone, especially not Kanan or Hera._ Isval followed Ezra out of the cabin, even though she really didn't want too. _If I don't follow Ezra, then Kanan will come, and that will be worse._

*********************Time Lapse*************************

Kanan walked into the commons room of the Ghost and sat down next to Isval.

Isval looked up from her bowl of meiloorun soup that she had been staring at.

"Hey kiddo." He said gently.

"Hey." She quietly replied.

Kanan locked eyes with her, "How're you doing?"

Isval shrugged and looked away, "I'm alright." In reality though, she was the exact opposite.

"I have a hard time believing that. Do you want to talk?"

That was the last thing Isval wanted, "N-no, I'm good."

Kanan quietly sighed, "Isval, I lost my Master too, so I know how you're feeling. It helps to talk about it though, okay?"

"Kanan, I'm alright, really." She stood up.

 _Maybe she's still in shock._ Thought Kanan, "Ugh, fine. But the moment you need to talk come to me."

Isval nodded. _I need to get out of here for awhile. Everyone's treating me like a beaten loth-kitten._ She ran back to her cabin and pulled out her bow. It was simple, made out of a strong fiberglass like material, with a durable string, and decent quality sight. She grabbed five arrows, the shafts were fiberglass like, with feather fletchings, and sharp points made out of a conductive metal, so that when a button on the arrow was pressed, a small power cell in each arrow would send a electric current to the point.

Isval snuck out of The Liberator and made her way toward the tree line, walking with quiet huntress like steps. She continued to walk until she was about a mile or two into the woods, where she found a nice tall tree with a fork to sit in, right next to a small creek. She climbed up the tree, using the branches to pull herself up, until she reached the fork. She sat down in it, and pulled her bow off her back. _I'm glad to be away from everyone's questions and looks...especially Kanan and Ezra's._ She still didn't trust the Ghost crew. Soon her peace ended though, as thoughts of Ahsoka flooded Isval's mind again, making her want to scream. I _should have done something to save her...I could have done something._ She took in a shaky breath, _Isval, focus._ she mentally told herself.

She tried to keep her mind off of Ahsoka by pulling her hunting knife and a partly carved Phoenix bird out of her cargo pants. She sat there, carving the intricate figurine until a lone anooba came up to the creek and started drinking. She carefully placed the figurine and knife back in her pocket, then picked up her bow, nocked and pressed the button on an arrow, and aimed. The arrow flew straight and true into the anooba's heart, with no suffering for the animal. She climbed down the tree, pulled out her knife and field dressed the animal. It was a medium sized anooba, about 30 or so pounds. Isval grabbed the anooba's legs and started to drag it out of the woods.

Isval's comm beeped, she dropped the anooba and answered it. "Hello?"

"Isval?! Where the hell are you?!" Asked Kanan angrily.

Isval cringed as Kanan yelled through the comm. "Uh...I'm in the woods."

"What?! You're supposed to tell us before you go somewhere like that! What would happen if Imperials spotted you or you were injured?!" Came Kanan's angry voice. He wasn't trying to yell at Isval, but his protective, fatherly nature meant that he wanted to protect her and the whole crew.

"I'm sorry Kanan. I'm heading back to the Liberator now." Isval said quietly, turning off her comm before Kanan could answer. _Great, now Kanan's mad at me. I'm such a stupid failure._ Isval chided herself.

***************Time Lapse**********************

Isval dropped off the anooba near the loading hatch of the Ghost.

She walked up the ramp into the loading area of the Ghost, then climbed up the ladder to the main floor. She headed down the hall and into the galley, where she grabbed a sticky note and pen, and scribbled out,

 _Brought you dinner. It's sitting outside the loading hatch of the Ghost._

 _~Isval_

She put down the pen and headed back to her cabin on the Liberator. Isval climbed up into her bunk and laid on it, staring up at the ceiling and thinking, _I'm the reason Ahsoka died...Kanan's mad at me...I'm just a stupid failure...I should've stayed on Shili...I could take an Imperial shuttle back to Shili...Naw, Kanan would freak out, I left for a few hours and now he's pissed at me...Anyways, the stupid Imperials would probably recognize me, then I'd be a goner..._ Finally, she rolled over and reached for her small canvas bag that was hung from her bunk, she rummaged around in it until she found what she was looking for; a small silver blade, the only thing that she could ever count on to always be there for her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi everyone! There is some self-harm in this this chapter, so if you don't like that kind of thing then don't read it. I Hope this chapter is alright, I know how I want this story to end, but I'm still trying to figure out how to lead up to that, if you know what I mean? Anyways...enjoy! Don't forget to follow, favorite, and review! :)**

Isval held the shiny razor blade in her hand and walked into the bathroom attached to her and Ahsoka's cabin. She shut and locked the door before stripping off her clothes, except for a thin tank top and shorts. Isval looked at herself in the mirror, scars littered her body, big, small, long, thin, intricate, rough, deep, shallow, and everything in between. She lifted up her shirt, scars lined her stomach as well.

She was an artist, but the canvas was her body, the paintbrush was her razor blade, and the paint was her blood.

She sat cross legged on the floor, and found a spot on her right calve where there were no scars. She dragged the blade across it, savoring the pain, watching the blood fill the line she had just cut, _This one's for going into the woods._ She dragged the blade across again, _This one's for leaving Shili._ And again, a bit deeper this time, _This one's for pissing off Kanan and being an idiot._ She dragged the blade across one final time, deeper, longer, more intricate, _And this one's for failing to save Ahsoka._ She set the blade down and watched the blood drip down her leg, stone faced and calm. She sat there, staring at the cuts she had just inflicted upon herself, enjoying the the pain from them. The pain that temporarily distracted her from another pain, a pain that threatened to tear her apart, the pain of Ahsoka's death.

Finally she stood up, took out a med-pack from under the vanity, pulled out a roll of gauze, and wrapped her deepest cut with it. She pulled her clothes back on, left the bathroom, and deposited the blade back in her canvas bag.

Suddenly her cabin door opened, Isval was taken by surprise, she looked over to see who it was, _It's Ezra again_... She pulled on a small fake smile. "Hey Ezra."

"Hey Isval. What are you doing?" Ezra cheerily said.

Isval quickly pulled her bow over towards her, "Uhh...just checking and adjusting my bow." She quickly lied.

"Are you a pretty good shot? Because I bet I can shoot way better than you." Ezra teased her. He hadn't wanted to admit it, but he found himself quite attracted to Isval. He thought back to Kanan's earlier advice, " _Maybe she has a hobby or talent you can ask her about."_ He had seen that anooba she had shot, so he decided to leap at the chance to challenge her to a shoot off.

"I'm a decent shot." Isval replied modestly.

"I have sniper-like accuracy." Ezra bluffed.

Isval looked at him skeptically, "Really?"

Ezra nodded, "Since you don't seem to believe me, I challenge you to a shoot off."

 _Maybe he'll leave me alone after this if I agree._ "It's a deal."

Ezra smiled, "C'mon then." He gently grabbed Isval's arm.

She brushed his hand off. _Is he flirting with me?_

They walked up the hall and turned a corner, walking down the ramp. Ezra grabbed a couple cans and jugs from the small trash pile, diligently placing them down in two lines.

Isval pulled her Westar-35 blaster pistol from its holster at her waist. She also had a DH-17 pistol hidden in her boot, because hey, it never hurt to be prepared.

"Woah, I've only seen Mandalorians with those. Sabine has a pair that she customized. Where did you manage to find yours?"

"The black market."

"That's alway a good place to find stuff like that. I've been able to find some pretty sweet pieces of tech on Lothal's black market."

Isval decided to do something she rarely did, share a tiny snippet of her history, "I got all of my weapons, including my bow and the parts I used to modify it, back on Shili's black market."

"Back before I met the Ghost crew, I used to steal stuff to sell to Ferpil Walleway, who'd put them up on the black market. He paid me fairly for everything too..." Ezra fondly remembered.

Isval nodded, she felt like she should share what she did before Ahsoka took her in, she quietly said, "I hunted for a living, I'd sell the meat and hides in Shili's market..." She quickly changed the subject, "We should get back to that shoot off."

Ezra nodded and pulled on a grin, "May the best shot win." He pulled out his blaster/lightsaber combo and aimed at the first target, about 20 yards away. He fired, and the stun bolt easily hit the middle of the target.

Isval took her turn, favoring her Westar-35 blaster pistol. She carefully aimed at her target, which was 20 yards away, _Focus, Isval._ She closed her eyes for a few seconds and let the Force wash over her, a rhythm of calm energy enveloped her. She opened her eyes and fired, a perfect dead center shot.

The expression on Ezra's face showed he was clearly impressed.

They took turns shooting at the targets, both hitting their targets perfectly, until they got to 70 yards away, where Ezra slightly missed his target, but Isval nailed hers dead center.

Ezra grinned, "You are more than a decent shot!"

Isval blushed. _He's just being nice, I'm not that great a shot._ After living on the streets for years she had become immune to any praise.

Ezra comm beeped, "Hello?"

"Kanan's voice came through the comm, "Hey Ez, is Isval with you?"

"Hey Kanan. Yeah, she's with me."

"We're having a family meeting, and we need you two. Can you and Isval come into the commons room of the Ghost?"

"Sure."

"Good, see you two in five minutes." Kanan turned off his comm.

"Let's go." Ezra said to Isval.

 _Great, Kanan's probably going to lecture me on, "Not going anywhere without telling them."_ It was during times like this that Isval missed the freedom of being on her own. She reluctantly followed Ezra.

*********Time Lapse***********

Isval stood in the commons room of the Ghost.

"Isval," Kanan gently said, "Hera, Ezra, myself and the whole crew," He gestured to everyone sitting around them, "had a meeting earlier, and we've decided we want you to join our crew." He looked into Isval's green eyes, "More specifically, Ezra and I want to know if you'd like to become my second Padawan."

Isval stood there, shocked. She sputtered out "But...but...what about the rule of two?"

"I though about that earlier, and I figured we could make a bit of an exception. When I was a Padawan there were always two, a master, and an apprentice." Kanan's face darkened, "But those days are gone now, we're in a new era. So we need to adapt the rules slightly."

All eyes were on Isval. She could feel them on her, burning into her flesh, threatening to get a glimpse at her true self, under the hard, protective shell she wore. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, all her self-doubt and fears crept into her head, _You know he doesn't really want you to join the crew, Isval. He's just going to hurt you or leave you, that's what they all do eventually. You're just a waste of space and unlovable._ She momentarily pushed past her self-doubt and opened her mouth to speak, "I...I'll do it, I'll become your second Padawan."

Zeb stood up, "Welcome to the crew, Specter 7!" He gave her a pat on the shoulder.

Everyone came and congratulated Isval, Sabine even gave her a hug, but in her mind, Isval couldn't help but wonder, _How long is this going to last? They always leave, always._

 **So what do you guys think of the story so far? Is Isval a believable character? Do I sound *fairly* like Kanan and Ezra? Leave me you opinion in the reviews. :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello everyone! I'm sorry I haven't updated this story in so terribly long, I've been busy and stressed with school, I was gone with friends all last weekend, I'm trying to find a job, I have a cold, and to top it all off, I have writers block for this story. Anyways...enough about me. Lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and as always, don't forget to follow/favorite/review. :)**

Isval struggled down the hall with a large box of her things, _Just a bit farther now._ She gritted her teeth as she carried the heavy box towards the Ghost.

"Aye, need a hand, kid?" Came Zeb's gruff voice.

"No...I think...I got...it." Isval heaved in between breaths.

Zeb walked up to her and plucked the box out of her arms, "You're heavin' like you just ran a marathon, Kid. Aye, lemme' take that box."

Isval bent over to catch her breath, "Thanks...Zeb."

Zeb nodded.

They walked up to what was now Isval and Sabine's cabin. Sabine looked up from her painting as they entered the room, a dash of green spray paint on her cheek, "Hey Isval!"

Zeb put the box of Isval's things down on the floor, "See ya later, Kiddo."

"See you later Zeb." Isval quietly replied. She looked over at Sabine's painting.

"Ta-da!" Sabine said happily, pointing to her painting. It was graffiti-inspired, and depicted Isval and Sabine, blasters drawn and shooting stormtroopers.

"Oh Sabine...its amazing!" Isval gawked.

"I'm glad you like it...roommate!" Sabine smiled and gave her an impromptu hug. "You should get unpacked."

Isval nodded and quickly grabbed her canvas bag off of the top of the box. She climbed up to what was her new bunk, and when Sabine wasn't looking, she carefully hid it under her pillow.

Sabine's comm started to beep, and she quickly answered it, "Hello?"

Kanan's strong voice came through the comm, "Specter 5, I'm assuming Isval's with you?"

"She is."

"I need Isval for Jedi training."

"Copy that, Kanan. She'll be down there in a minute." Sabine turned off her comm and spun her paint sprayer around in her hand, "This is going to be your first training session with Kanan and Ezra, right?"

Isval nodded.

"Good luck. Kanan can be a bit harsh sometimes, but he's a nice guy, I'm sure you'll do fine."

Isval looked away, "Yeah..."

Sabine motioned to Isval, "You better go, they're waiting for you."

Isval nodded again and left their cabin.

~~~~~~~Time Lapse~~~~~~~

Isval sparred with Ezra, both their lightsabers on low power mode, as not to injure each other. Flashes of blue and white filled the air, turning green when the lightsabers clashed.

Kanan shouted out commands, "Focas!" "Isval, keep your elbows bent and close to your body when blocking!" "Keep your blade up!" "Isval, keep your arms from crossing, you lose to much maneuverability!"

After an exhausting half an hour of sparring, in which Ezra (not surprisingly) had come out on top, Kanan called for his Padawan's to take a break.

 _Oh thank the maker!_ Thought Isval, breathing heavily. She grabbed her water bottle and took a drink.

Ezra walked over to her, "Nice job."

"Oh, uh, thanks." Isval said surprised and slightly embarrassed. *

Ezra slyly smiled, "Don't mention it. Uh, hey, if you wanna, umm, hang out and shoot targets or stuff, or just hang out again sometime, feel free to tell me."

Isval blushed and looked away.

Ezra looked embarrassed and quickly sputtered out, "I mean if you don't want to hang out, we don't have too."

Isval could tell that Ezra was either trying to be kind, or flirting. She hoped it was the former, because she didn't think she could ever love someone, she was to afraid they'd leave or hurt her. "Umm...sure, we can hang out sometime." She put on a small smile.

Ezra grinned, "Great! How about tomorrow after Jedi training? Or is that to soon?"

"That'll work." Isval cracked another small smile.

Kanan walked up to them, "Isval, let's work some more on your parrying."

"Okay." Isval nervously stood up and followed Kanan.

Kanan demonstrated a simple parry, "Now you try."

Isval tried to replicate it as best as she could.

"Drop your blade!" Kanan replied.

Isval tried again.

"Keep your feet a bit farther apart!"

 _C'mon Isval, this is so damn simple, why can't you get it? You're a horrible student._ Isval mentally reprimanded herself. She shut her eyes and let the Force wash through her, it's calming energy enveloping her. She opened her eyes and tried again.

"Better, but it still needs improvement. Here, I'll try to strike at you and you parry the strike."

Isval nodded and stood in a proper Form 3 stance in front of Kanan. He swung, and Isval tried to parry his swing, but she was to late, his swing struck her side, and she cringed slightly at the slight stinging sensation that followed.

Kanan looked unimpressed, "Let's try that again."

It took Isval about five more attempts before she finally managed to parry one of Kanan's strikes.

Kanan nodded at her, "Better. Much better." He looked over at Ezra, "Let's work on some counter-attack moves."

Isval went and sat down on a crate to watch them. Master and Apprentice, just the way it should be. She pulled her knees up to her chin as her demons tried to fill her head again, _Look at them, one Master and one talented apprentice, just the way it should be. Not one Master, one talented apprentice, and one apprentice who can't even parry._ She took in a shaky breath.

She felt a hand on her shoulder, and looked up to see Ezra looking down at her worriedly.

"Hey, you alright?"

She pulled her knees out from under her chin and brushed his hand off, "Yeah, I-I'm fine." She bit her lip slightly as she lied.

"Good. Kanan said training is over for today."

"Oh, uh, good. I think I'm going to go finish unpacking."

"Well, see you for dinner I guess."

Isval shivered and wrapped her arms around herself, "Yeah, see you there..." She could feel the protective wall she had put up around her heart trying to crumble, trying to let the crew in, trying to b

elieve she had a family. But her mind and the demons inside it still couldn't believe it. So as she walked back into her and Sabine's cabin, she again pulled out her only true friend, the friend that would momentarily take away all her failure: her blade.


End file.
